i got lady troubles but i sure as hell dont give a shit when i'm
driving in the purple camaro there was one time when
i said girl lets paint the town
first she like
"what fingerpaint it or watercolor?
you know how to color by numbers?"
i say girl lets paint the town
i ask her what color she say brown
i say i was thinking red and she say
"blood and shit are the same thing
so lets paint it brown to mark us from the next guy
its like we paint the whole town red cept different"
i's like "no i dont think so in fact you are completely wrong
given the background of the phrase it has nothing to do
with blood or with poo but rather in 1837
to celebrate the fox hunt an englishman
and some of his fellows stole paint and daubed
liberal applications upon the buildings of Melton Mowbray"
i guess she did not like that too much because
she slapped me and rolled out the passengers side
in the rearview i saw her go rolling over leaves
and fall down the gutter
~*~it should come as no surprise that this was not the last i would see of her*~*
i keep on at the wheel singin
o open maw bitches
bitches and abomination bibles i will thump
i am in between the teeth or out in the cold
these bitches never give me any choice so i ask
why do you want to make me cry
why do you want to crash my race car
an arrangement not to be lonely
there is no good reason to be alone
there is no good reason not to be on
some lavender shit
if you must know
i still take a morning pill
and keep my trap shut all day
on account of the blue yodels
the blue yodels and the nocturnes,
at the slut christmas party
i knocked away the cup
jezebel eggnog and bitchery
that keeps me mostly solo
but for years this lady has
called me on the phone
saying "im calling from the lost tunnels"
saying "im calling from xanadu's ruins"
saying "im calling from blackest congo"
pretending like she crying
just to put on a show and
that is why i am so fond of her
