XLXI

i got lady troubles but i sure as hell dont give a shit when i'm

driving in the purple camaro there was one time when

i said girl lets paint the town

first she like

"what fingerpaint it or watercolor?

you know how to color by numbers?"

i say girl lets paint the town

i ask her what color she say brown

i say i was thinking red and she say

"blood and shit are the same thing

so lets paint it brown to mark us from the next guy

its like we paint the whole town red cept different"

i's like "no i dont think so in fact you are completely wrong

given the background of the phrase it has nothing to do

with blood or with poo but rather in 1837

to celebrate the fox hunt an englishman

and some of his fellows stole paint and daubed

liberal applications upon the buildings of Melton Mowbray"

i guess she did not like that too much because

she slapped me and rolled out the passengers side

in the rearview i saw her go rolling over leaves

and fall down the gutter

~*~it should come as no surprise that this was not the last i would see of her*~*

i keep on at the wheel singin

o open maw bitches

bitches and abomination bibles i will thump

i am in between the teeth or out in the cold

these bitches never give me any choice so i ask

why do you want to make me cry

why do you want to crash my race car

an arrangement not to be lonely

there is no good reason to be alone

there is no good reason not to be on

some lavender shit

if you must know

i still take a morning pill

and keep my trap shut all day

on account of the blue yodels

the blue yodels and the nocturnes,

at the slut christmas party

i knocked away the cup

jezebel eggnog and bitchery

that keeps me mostly solo

but for years this lady has

called me on the phone

saying "im calling from the lost tunnels"

saying "im calling from xanadu's ruins"

saying "im calling from blackest congo"

pretending like she crying

just to put on a show and

that is why i am so fond of her